Cue the trumpets! My computer is back from the dead.
My miracle-working husband reconstructed the entire machine from the ground up, starting with the operating system. Right now nothing looks the same, and I’m missing all sorts of programs and files — but (huzzah!) I have every single scrap of my writing and all but a handful of emails.
So it looks like I don’t have to let go of those treasured emails just yet. And I’m so relieved. I was trying to be brave about it, but losing them was devastating.
Still, I can see I’m going to get plenty of practice this year at letting go — of my own words, if nothing else. (Please may there be nothing else.) While my computer was down, I read through the first draft of my WIP. Ouch. I’d forgotten just how rough my first drafts can be.
Between the plot holes and the scenes-that-don’t-work and the glaring inconsistencies, I nearly gave up then and there. There was much weeping and wailing. There was even the traditional making-of-the-list (in which I catalog career options open to failed writers, something I do with pretty much every book, usually after reading the first draft. Not that I could think of very many, especially in these hard times).
And then, out of the blue, I had an idea of how to fix one of the plot holes. And then a while later another idea came to me about how to fix some of the scenes that don’t work (which involve a character who doesn’t work). And then still later I had another idea about how to resolve some of the inconsistencies.
It is going to be an *enormous* amount of work. And I still feel shaky about it all. But I’m more-or-less back to thinking like a writer, and that feels better than weeping and wailing.